re-mixed metaphor

"cntrl + z" doesn't help

when the microwave beeps

and you can't find your hampster

logic

miss piggy had genital warts

you are here

the duck never sleeps

he lurks at the dull edge of vision...

at the soft borders of night

he watches

tapping one webbed foot in time to the soft strains
of distant bagpipes

sipping mango-tinis

and watching

know me... fear my fish-ness

the felt guru travels

the stuffed fish, alone, casts one plastic eye about
seeking an opportunity to spread chaos

but it's ok, 'cuz he looks cool
in his red hat

way to be, stuffed fish
way to be, little fuzzy lord of chaos

i'm not sorry

if a tree falls in the forest,
and the only one there to hear it,
is the pregnant, wheel-chair bound nun it landed on...

does it still get the points?

they barfed... we left

what can i say?

dinner and a show.

good times...

(the cleaning has begun)

bob

...sdrawkcab epyt i semitemos

?tahw os

...ti wercs

crush the non-believers

i slow, steps faulter, stop
ill wind blows soflty through the woods
a centipede crawling on my spine
i shudder

the trees..
the trees...

the trees are full of... pigs

tree pigs

oink oink
rustle rustle

my god... the felt-ish unease

the little purple felt guru...
it hungers for the beers that bow before it

the beers gives it power...
power it craves
it relishes its crown of beads

we cry
and turn away

(more beer)

the stuffed fish urges him on

little purple felt guru, why do you mock me

your mouth is the head of a small black pin

your eyes are the same

fucking bowling ball

you make me smile with your mute derision

turtles are good

snow is like nature's white, fluffy, frozen rain that falls softly from the sky

to shit on my world and bust my balls

little purple felt guru on my desk

ever get the feeling nobody's watching you?

bi-curious george

i take credit for other people's farts on elevators

which freaks the other guy out
when there's only two of us

smoke the shoe

golden retrievers are born stoned

the duck knows you're reading this

if i had a small silver box set with emeralds, i'd put my pocket lint in it

every new year's eve, i'd make a lint troll

then burn it